Gambling Addiction

Signs, Symptoms, and Treatment 

Gambling addiction, also known as compulsive gambling, is a type of impulse-control disorder. Compulsive gamblers can’t control the impulse to gamble, even when they know their gambling is hurting themselves or their loved ones. Gambling is all they can think about and all they want to do, no matter the consequences. Compulsive gamblers keep gambling whether they’re up or down, broke or flush, happy or depressed. Even when they know the odds are against them, even when they can’t afford to lose, people with a gambling addiction can’t “stay off the bet.”

Gamblers can have a problem, however, without being totally out of control. Problem gambling is any gambling behavior that disrupts your life. If you’re preoccupied with gambling, spending more and more time and money on it, chasing losses, or gambling despite serious consequences, you have a gambling problem.

Signs and symptoms of problem gambling

Gambling addiction is sometimes referred to as the “hidden illness” because there are no obvious physical signs or symptoms like there are in drug or alcohol addiction. Problem gamblers typically deny or minimize the problem. They also go to great lengths to hide their gambling. For example, problem gamblers often withdraw from their loved ones, sneak around, and lie about where they’ve been and what they’ve been up to.

Do I have a gambling problem?

You may have a gambling problem if you:

• Feel the need to be secretive about your gambling. You might gamble in secret or lie about how much you gamble, feeling others won’t understand or that you will surprise them with a big win.
• Have trouble controlling your gambling. Once you start gambling, can you walk away? Or are you compelled to gamble until you’ve spent your last dollar, upping your bets in a bid to win lost money back?
• Gamble even when you don’t have the money. A red flag is when you are getting more and more desperate to recoup your losses. You may gamble until you’ve spent your last dollar, and then move on to money you don’t have- money to pay bills, credit cards, or things for your children. You may feel pushed to borrow, sell or even steal things for gambling money. It’s a vicious cycle. You may sincerely believe that gambling more money is the only way to win lost money back. But it only puts you further and further in the hole.
• Family and friends are worried about you. Denial keeps problem gambling going. If friends and family are worried, listen to them carefully. Take a hard look at how gambling is affecting your life. It’s not a sign of weakness to ask for help.  

Does my loved one have a gambling problem?

If your loved one has a gambling problem, he or she might:

• Become increasingly defensive about his or her gambling. The more a problem gambler is in the hole, the more the need to defend gambling as a way to get money. Your loved one may get secretive, defensive or even blame you for the need to gamble, telling you that it is all for you and you need to trust in the “big win someday”.
• Suddenly become secretive over money and finances. Your loved one might show a new desire to control household finances, or there might increasingly be a lack of money despite the same income and expenses. Savings and assets might mysteriously dwindle, or there may be unexplained loans or cash advances.
• Become increasingly desperate for money to fund the gambling. Credit card bills may increase, or your loved one may ask friends and family for money. Jewelry or other items easily pawned for money may mysteriously disappear. 

Roadblocks to recovery in problem gambling:

The biggest step in treatment is realizing you have a problem with gambling. It takes tremendous strength and courage to own up to this, especially if you have lost a lot of money and strained or broken relationships along the way. Don’t despair, and don’t try to go it alone. Many others have been in your shoes and have been able to break the habit.  Overcoming a gambling addiction or problem is never easy. But recovery is possible if you stick with treatment and seek support. When you are ready, for advice or a treatment referral, call the National Council on Problem Gambling’s confidential hotline at 1-800-522-4700.

Group support for gambling addiction and problem gambling

Gamblers Anonymous is a twelve-step recovery program patterned after Alcoholics Anonymous. These free programs, facilitated by peers, use group support and a set of guided principles, the 12 steps, to obtain and maintain sobriety. The treatment recovery steps include admitting powerlessness over gambling and surrendering to a “higher power,” which you can interpret according to your own beliefs. A key part of a 12-step program is choosing a sponsor. A sponsor is a former gambler who has time and experience remaining sober, and can provide guidance and assistance to you. Gamblers Anonymous provides a supportive, non-judgmental atmosphere where you can share what you’re going through, and get feedback and advice from fellow gamblers who understand your problem.

Therapy for problem gambling

Cognitive-behavioral therapy for problem gambling focuses on changing unhealthy gambling behaviors and thoughts, such as rationalizations and false beliefs. It also teaches problem gamblers how to fight gambling urges, deal with uncomfortable emotions rather than escape through gambling, and solve financial, work, and relationship problems caused by the addiction. The goal of treatment is to “rewire” the addicted brain by thinking about gambling in a new way. A variation of cognitive behavioral therapy, called the Four Steps Program, has been used in treatment of compulsive gambling as well. The goal is to change your thoughts and beliefs about gambling in four steps; relabel, reattribute, refocus, and revalue. More comprehensive information about cognitive behavioral therapy and applying it to your situation is found below.

Seeing a therapist does not mean you are weak or can’t handle your problems. Therapy is for people who are smart enough to realize they need help. It can give you tools and support for reframing your thoughts that will last a lifetime.

Maintaining recovery for problem gambling and gambling addiction

As you may have noticed, quitting problem gambling is easy. You’ve probably told yourself that many times, yet find yourself back in your gambling habits without realizing what happened.  It’s staying in recovery- making a permanent commitment to stay away from gambling- that is such a challenge. Maintaining recovery for problem gambling and gambling addiction  is possible if you surround yourself with people to whom you’re accountable, avoid tempting environments, give up control of your finances (at least at first), and find exciting or enjoyable activities to replace gambling. It’s also important to keep stress in check, since stress can trigger compulsive gambling or make it worse.

Dealing with gambling cravings

Feeling the urge to gamble is normal, but that doesn’t make it any easier when you are struggling to make better choices. Remember, as you build healthier choices and a good support network, resisting cravings will be easier and easier. The following strategies can help

• Reach out for support. Call a trusted family member, meet a friend for coffee, or go to a Gamblers Anonymous meeting.
• Do something else. Distract yourself with another activity, such as cleaning your house, going to the gym, or watching TV.
• Postpone gambling. Tell yourself that you’ll wait five minutes, fifteen minutes, or an hour — however long you think you can hold out. As you wait, the urge to gamble may pass or become weak enough to resist.
• Give yourself a reality check. Visualize what will happen if you give in to the urge to gamble. Think about how you’ll feel after all your money is gone and you’ve disappointed yourself and your family again.

If you aren’t able to resist the gambling craving, don’t be too hard on yourself or use it as an excuse to give up. Overcoming a gambling addiction is a tough process. You may slip from time to time; the important thing is to learn from your mistakes and continue working towards recovery.

Helping a family member with a gambling problem

If your family member has a gambling problem, you may have many conflicting emotions. You may try to cover up for a loved one or spend a lot of time and energy trying to keep him or her from gambling. At the same time, you might be furious at your loved one for gambling again and tired of trying to keep up the charade. As much as you may want to, and as hard as it is seeing the effects, you cannot make someone stop gambling. The final choice is up to them.

Ironically, one of the best ways to help a problem gambler is to help yourself. You have a right to protect yourself emotionally and financially. Don’t blame yourself for the gambler’s problems. The right support can help you make positive choices for yourself, and balance encouraging your loved one to get help without losing yourself in the process.

Tips for family members of problem gamblers:

• Don’t go it alone. It can feel so overwhelming coping with a loved ones problem gambling that it may seem easier to rationalize their requests and problems “this one last time”. Or you might feel ashamed, feeling like you are the only one who has problems like this. Reaching out for support will make you realize that many families have struggled with this problem. Peer support like Gam-Anon, a free support group for families of problem gamblers, can give you help and feedback from others who have been there in all stages of the process. Or you might consider therapy to help sort out the complicated feelings that arise from coping with a problem gambler.
• Set boundaries in managing money. If a loved one is serious about getting help for problem gambling, it may help if you take over the family finances to make sure the gambler stays accountable and to prevent relapse. However, this does not mean you are responsible for micromanaging the problem gamblers impulses to gamble. Your first responsibilities are to ensure that your own finances and credit are not at risk.
•  Consider how you will handle requests for money. Problem gamblers often become very good at asking for money, either directly or indirectly. They may use pleading, manipulation or even threats and blaming to get it. It takes time and practice to learn how you will respond to these requests to ensure you are not enabling the problem gambler and keeping your own dignity intact.

Help and support for problem gambling and gambling addiction

The National Council on Problem Gambling – Offers a confidential, 24-hour helpline for problem gamblers or their family members. Call 1-800-522-4700. Gamblers Anonymous – Twelve-step Gamblers Anonymous program, a nationwide support network of meetings to assist people who have a gambling problem. About Problem Gambling – Guide to problem gambling, compulsive gambling and gambling addiction. Includes an FAQ and the signs and symptoms. (The National Council on Problem Gambling) Do I Need Help? : Helpful Questions for Self-evaluation – Includes questions for self-evaluation, as well as questions for family members who suspect a gambling problem. (Connecticut Department of Mental Health and Addiction Services) The Self Survey “Twenty Questions” – Online questionnaire to help gamblers determine if they have a problem or a gambling addiction. (California Department of Drug and Alcohol Programs) Finding Help: Treatment and Self-help Programs – Covers the treatment options for compulsive gambling and gambling addiction. (Connecticut Department of Mental Health and Addiction Services)Problem Gamblers and their Finances (PDF) – In-depth guide for treatment professionals on how to help a problem gambler cope with financial problems and pressures. (Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration) The Four Steps Although the article is written for Obsessive Compulsive Disorder, it outlines in more detail the four steps used in a variant of cognitive behavioral therapy, and how you can apply them to change thought processes and control impulses (Westwood Institute of Anxiety Disorders, commercial site).

Your First Step to Change: Gambling – Self-change toolkit helps problem gamblers learn how to overcome their addiction. (The Division on Addictions, Cambridge Health Alliance and Harvard Medical School)

Freedom from Problem Gambling (PDF) – Self-help workbook for compulsive gamblers, with tips on how to avoid relapse and fight gambling urges. (California Department of Drug and Alcohol Programs)

Problem Gambling and the Family – Learn how gambling addiction affects the family and what family members can do to address the problem. (Connecticut Department of Mental Health and Addiction Services)

Help for Families – Suggestions on how to handle a family member’s compulsive or problem gambling. (Chris Lobsinger’s Problem Gambling)

Gam-Anon – Twelve-step program for the problem gambler’s spouse, family members, or close friends. (Gam-Anon International Service Office, Inc)

Joanna Saisan, MSW, Jeanne Segal, Ph.D., and Melinda Smith, M.A., contributed to this article. Last reviewed: May 2010.

 

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