Many people find themselves telling a lie at least once in their life. It may feel difficult not to tell the truth, but at the time, it just seemed like the right thing to do. Most people feel a little bit of remorse over it and regret their actions later. Some vow to be more truthful in the future.
Even though these are common feelings after telling a fib, compulsive liars do not feel the same way about their actions. People that lie on a regular basis have no remorse or regret when they don’t tell the truth. Many times, they don’t even think twice about it. They go on lying just as easily as telling the truth.
Why is it easy for liars to tell a lie? It’s become a habit for them. Just like any other bad habit, once you start doing it, you become more comfortable with it. After you become more comfortable with something, it’s much harder to stop than to continue.
Recognizing the Symptoms of Compulsive Lying
It can take some time to come to the realization that someone is lying compulsively. At first, it’s easy to take everything a person says as the truth. After some time, you may begin to realize that many of the things this person is telling you simply don’t add up. You begin to see that life around this person doesn’t correlate to the life the person portrays. This is only the beginning.
Here are some more symptoms of compulsive liars that may not be as straightforward.
- Low self-esteem: This is a hallmark of most people with a compulsive lying disorder. Deep-seated feelings of inferiority drive such a person to fabricate a persona that makes them feel more worthy.
- Other negative personality traits: Compulsive lying is often a secondary impulse related to other personality disorders. Watch for narcissistic and/or manipulative behavior. Inappropriate emotions and impulsive reactions to situations can be another tip off that something is not quite right.
- Attention Deficit/Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD): People suffering from ADHD also demonstrate impulsive behavior, and it’s possible for this to escalate into uncontrollable lying if not kept in check.
- Addictions: People with addictions to gambling, alcohol, drugs or other activities also are much more likely to lie compulsively.
- Bipolar Disorder: Sufferers of a bipolar disorder seesaw through periods of depression and mania. Depression is usually accompanied by low self-esteem and feeling like life is dreadful. Mania is the complete opposite, and a person feels like life is grand and nothing can get in the way. Impulsive behavior is common during this period, and it becomes easier to tell a lie than face reality.
- Inability to face reality: Even when confronted with the cold facts, a true compulsive liar will never admit the truth. Attempts to make the person do so will result in further lying and perhaps even emotional outbursts designed to deflect attention from the lying.
Help for Compulsive Liars
Treatment for compulsive liars involves therapy and a lot of work outside of the therapist’s office. Is it possible to break the cycle of lying? Yes, but it’s extremely difficult to break the addiction to the attention that the lying garners, and here is the root of the problem. The liar will have to actually admit to having a problem with lying. Since this strikes at the person’s self-esteem, some find it impossible to do.
No one can force a compulsive liar to get help. This is a decision that each person has to make for his or herself. However, if the original self-esteem issue can be addressed and healed, it is more likely that the cycle of lying will gradually cease.
Reference: Love To Know Recovery
