This Week In Recovery Lesson
Transformative Recovery: Outside In/Inside Out
While God’s love for us is unconditional, the quality of relationship we have with God is conditional. This is evident throughout Scripture. Relationships always have a when-then quality to them. When one thing happens in relationship, then another thing happens in response. This is true of every relationship you have. It is not a theory; it’s a fact. You apply this fact about relationships to one degree or another everyday.
Don’t believe it? Confront the person in your life that is representative of the best, most loving, mutually compatible relationship you have, and be disgustingly rude to him or her. Be arrogantly selfish and obnoxious. Say horrible things. You don’t even have to cheat on your spouse to drastically alter the character, mood, and attitude he or she exhibits toward you. A few choice words ought to do the trick. You might be saying, “Oh, he’d forgive me” or, “She’s above that sort of thing”. Depending on how awful the thing is that you say or do, it could be awhile for things to return to “normal”, at least to the way they were, even after you tell your spouse that what you did was an experiment that you read written by a Christian Recovery Counselor. This paragraph was written to make a point, please do not go test the waters on this one.
The truth about even our most loving relationships is that one person or the other is at least slightly dominant in the relationship. Why? Because there is always someone in the relationship at least slightly more interested and invested than the other emotionally. This can be tricky because this truth and be skewed by the reality that one person in the relationship is at least a little bit more secure about themselves in the relationship than the other. So, the power in the relationship belongs to the least interested party. This does not mean, necessarily, that one loves more or less than the other; it simply means that the one who is more secure and less temperamentally sensitive will tend to have the power in the relationship.
- We will come back to this again later on but for now the question is this: In your relationship with God—Jesus Christ, who has the power?
- Considering the power of the least interested party principle, who would you say really has the power in your relationship with God?
- If you responded that God has the power in the relationship, does your life reflect that?
- If you answered “yes”, please explain how your life reflects that God has the power and authority in your life.
- If you answered “no” (Thank you for your honesty), please indicated how having the power in relationship with God affects the relationship.
- What would you say is the benefit to you to be more invested in your relationship with God?
- What would you say is the cost/consequence of being less invested in your relationship with God?
- Do you need for your life to be transformed by God into something better? Explain.
- Will you submit to the lordship of Christ (lordship means authority) by surrendering unto Him your will in order to experience the transformative power of God in your life?
Submission/surrender is the WHEN that is the condition to be committed—invested completely—in your relationship with God. To experience the life of empowering transformative recovery, you need to be about the WHEN in the relationship. God THEN will change you into something new.
Until you let go of all of the stuff in our life holds you down and keeps you stuck, you will wallow in double-minded beliefs and intentions, holding back the power of God who loves you and wants so much to set you free. But as long as you are holding on to the stuff—and you know what the “stuff” is that you’re holding on to—you hold on to the power and push back what God wants and will generously do for you.
Therefore, I urge you, brothers, in view of God’s mercy, to offer your bodies as living sacrifices, holy and pleasing to God—this is your spiritual act of worship. Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world, but betransformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is—his good, pleasing and perfect will. Romans 12:1-2 (NIV)
What We Do—
God desires to completely transform your life—every aspect of how you live—for your own good so that you will have a far better life.
- There is what we do in this transformative relationship, and there is what God does. What we do is offer our bodies to God sacrificially with our actions–our behavior. It is what we do with our eyes and our ears. It is what we do with what goes in and what comes out of our mouths. It is what we reach for with our arms and hold on to with our hands. It is where we go with our legs and where we stay with our feet (Romans 12:1). It is with our bodies that we give in to selfish urges and fall into addictive patterns, and with our bodies that we quit giving in.
- There is what we do from the outside in when we offer ourselves sacrificially to God by the way we behave with our bodies. Then there is what God does in us from the inside out to completely transform us by the full renewing of our minds—literally rearranging our brain chemistry so as to empower us to live better and to think and feel healthier. God exchanges our desires and intentions with His desires and intentions. We then can resist self-centered addictive urges through the power of prayer and actually live in freedom, proving that God’s plan for us is perfect and beautiful. (Romans 12:1-2) What we do is weoffer our bodies to God. Notice that the word ‘offer’ is an action verb.
—Why would you say Romans 12:1 begins, “In view of God’s mercy”?
- How do you offer your body to God with…
- Your brain?
- Your face?
- Your eyes?
- Your nose?
- Your ears?
- Your mouth?
- Your arms?
- Your hands?
- Your legs?
- Your feet?
- Your sexuality?
- “Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world.” What are patterns of behavior (lifestyle) and attitudes in the world that this Scripture might be referring to?
- What about the patterns of this world have an addictive element to them? Describe how the patterns you identified above are or have the potential to be addictive.
- How would you say these addictive patterns have affected your life with regard to…
- Your relationships?
- Your activities?
- Your time?
- Your diet?
- Your attitudes?
- Your lifestyle?
- Your idle time?
- Your “idol” time?
- How you communicate?
- How you problem solve?
- How you protect yourself?
- How you build confidence?
- How you manage pain?
- How you manage anxiety and stress?
- How you relate to God?
- What do your responses to the previous question indicate concerning your ability to commit your recovery into God’s care?
Please refer to this week’s TWRAC 014.
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